I was sent this quote the other day, from a website to which I have just started subscribing. Daily, some little gem arrives in my in box, and helps to set me thinking. Well, that and 101 other influences, some from my life, some from the news, some from cyber space. Some of the little gems are more precious than others. This one hit home.
"Reverencing begins with an attitude toward where creation comes from and what essentially it is. Jesus asks us to "love one another as I have loved you." This commandment is the greatest of all and requires a reverential relating. The word relation comes from the Latin meaning "side by side." It is not facing the same way next to each other. It means all our sides, our best side and worst, our inside and out, meeting appropriately the various sides of the other.
"What Jesus did and meant by loving was to continue the creation of those He met. He did heal, feed, find, teach, but always He was bringing life and a fuller sense of who each person was. If I reverently love you, then what I most want for you, through our relationship, is that you know more who you are, accept more who you are, and be more generous in giving yourself as a reverenced gift to others.We reverence as gifts from God those who have loved us not only into life but on to deeper living. Lovers assist God's creation and distribution of life through us. We are more available for loving others when we reverence the persons who have helped God create our good spirit, our softened heart, our gentled face, our welcoming hands."
I wonder how many Valentines Day evenings ended in tears, in disappointment, perhaps even in anger, because lovers fell out with each other, did not get what they wanted or expected, etc. Or how often in life, people who bought the biggest cheesiest cards and most flamboyant presents end up falling out of love, parting in acrimony at worst, or at best, with real sadness.
I sometimes face the shock of realisation that I have got to 47, and am still growing up. It is not that I am surprised that I am still learning, because I know just how much I do not know, how much I need to learn.... But I also realise just how much growing up I still need to do. That IS a shock, at 47. Unless you embrace the excitement of the dawning knowledge of there being so much more, still ahead of you.
This last year for me has been so DIFFERENT. Life had been quite predictable, was stuck in a rut, and although I enjoyed a lot about my life, there was no real prospect of change, of major new directions. Until something major went wrong in October 2006.
And that led on to this last year. Well, so much has changed, I have changed.... my perspectives, my experiences, my self knowledge, my friendships, my capacity to love.
I think it is in that last area that I have grown up the most. I used to think I was quite emotionally mature, well balanced. Well, I still do, looking back, but I can see just how far I have travelled this last year to fifteen months. Maybe there is an extra examination of love, when you are engaged in a long distance relationship. I have done long distances before, but the current 8,000 miles is certainly the longest.
But it has been amazing and wonderful to me, to see just how much love can develop and grow, even despite that distance. And part of that has been about Emma and I standing side by side in everything, sharing everything: from the romantic to the mundane; from the beauty of the countryside we see in the Philippines to the squalor of the urban dump in Manila, where she sometimes works; from the good times when life is easy to the not so good, when we face problems; from the joys to the sorrows..... And in sharing all of those things, we have seen all sides of each other. The times when it is easy to be appreciative of each other, to the times when we are tired and grumpy, or are learning to love aspects of each other which are new, unfamiliar....
It is hard, being separated. In many senses, I see part of my love for Emma as being demonstrated in my willingness to release her, to let her go, to let her serve others, overseas.... It is something she passionately believes in.... And I reverently love her, so what I most want for her, through our relationship, is that she knows more who she is, accepts more who she is, and can be more generous in giving herself as a reverenced gift to others.
And I am so much richer for that.... because, in loving her, I have found new aspects to my own life, which I never dreamt were there. And have found a passion, not just for her, but also for a whole country.... It is something we share now....
In love.....
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